My working days started not so long ago. In fact, this week, I turn two months old in my company. I am still trying to find my footing, but I have to say, I have been pretty blessed with a motivating boss and a welcoming team. This job is a great introduction to the American working class.
I feel pretty blessed at this point. Right this very moment, I am happy. I am happy to go to work, and I am happy to come home. I cannot recall having such a healthy balance in my life before. Although my commuting pretty much ate up my time for working out in the early evening and my weight gain has become more palpable, I really cannot complain. A lot of people mistake that disposition as optimism, especially my new work friends, but really it’s not. I am just all too familiar what a stressful life is.
Here’s the thing though: I have been missing out on wifely duties. Maybe not even wifely, but chores to be more exact. Now, I feel the tiredness of the commute, and have a fixed schedule to follow. Chores are starting to build up as this new thing in my life occupies 40 hours of my week, plus 20 more to prepare and to commute home. Seeing three weeks’ worth of laundry building up, I can’t help but feel guilty.
I felt even worse over the weekend. The Husband was taking a nap while I chose to fold laundry. Ten minutes in, seeing that there was so much to do and pretty much getting overwhelmed, I banged the laundry basket, slammed the door, and pretty much kicked the bed frame to wake him up and say, “I COULD USE SOME HELP HERE, IF IT’S NOT TOO MUCH TROUBLE.” What a bitch, right? I bathed in my own bitterness, sulking as if it’s the Husband’s fault that the laundry got this bad.
But it’s not. Life is just taking over, and as much as I want to be the best wife ever that makes and packs meals, does chores, and still look so f*cking glamorous, I’m not. One way or another, a ball will drop, and it’s okay. I should be okay with it because it’s not a ball I can’t just pick up.
After my brief rampage, he just started folding clothes with me. I was quiet for about 20 minutes before I made my way over to his side of the bed and apologized. I know I upset him, and I know I was being unfair. After all, I was the one that insisted that he should nap and get some rest. But he easily accepted my apologies and bathed me in kisses. It was at that moment that I realized in order for balls to not keep falling on the floor, I should just be more honest and ask for help.
Wow. Even when he’s napping, he’s truly proving to be the better half in this partnership. Hahaha. Oh well. I can race him to be the better half tomorrow. <3