One of the pitfalls of living in a tropical country is how you will look stupid by having a scarf wrapped around you. And don’t tell me that I shouldn’t care what other people think (because I don’t already). It’s just really hard to keep wearing the scarf when it’s about 90 degrees outside.
So here’s an ode to scarves. And how I wish I get to be a globetrotting lass just so I can wear them when it’s windy and chilly outside. :)
Now who’s in love? :)
Though the week has barely started, I am already experiencing severe cases of rageaholism. So may I just be random today, especially that I am blogging at an hour that is not of my choosing?
1. Excuse you, but I am not hard-headed. I freaking comply every single rule imposed upon me. There is only ONE condition to that: I HAVE TO UNDERSTAND IT. Is it my fault that I cannot understand why corporate=black for you? You cannot rebrand a company just by changing the facade of a building, you have to change the people as well. It’s not leaving culture and tradition behind. It’s merely adding new ones. It’s called developing. Learn it. Live it. Love it. Or better, just read up on it. Then maybe I won’t have a hard time justifying why an institution is spending over a billion pesos on a luxury condominium.
*word vomit*
2. I am not being tough nor am I filled with pride. Is it too much to ask from anyone that maybe this time, they can consider me? I know what I did (and I did that on purpose, unfortunately) that made a person hurt as much as a person can. But does that other person know or at least, is that person considerate enough to acknowledge doing something of the same effect? I’ve been looking out for person after person after person all my life. Maybe this time, you all can consider looking out for me.
*word vomit*
3. You are probably the only thing that keeps me sane in my life right now and I am having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that you will have to go away soon in order to actually make a living. But I am comforted by the ideas and plans that you have for your future… and how those plans include me.
*word vomit*
Okaaay. I believe I am officially bulimic. So much for a great lunch.
As a girl, it is kind of weird to admit that I have never really grown fond of pink. Even if some close friends would argue (because my senior prom dress is pink which I chose at that time because my date likes girls in pink), I will always find it hard to pick up a pink item and buy it with my own money. But it still goes to say that I like a particular hue of that unusually unwanted shade of mine. When worn with a particular softness and a touch of taupe/beige/tan, it easily becomes the most romantic color and piece a girl will ever own.
And for that reason alone, I think I just might go out and get me some soft pinks.
And by that, I mean it can range from tops and bottoms to shoes and simple frills.
Haven’t shopped for the last three weeks. No wonder I’ve been sick.
These stylish women all came from Chictopia. :)
Of course, I feel that way everyday. I look at my Facebook friends, and see the faces I haven’t seen since grade school. And they’re all abroad or in their swanky new apartment/condo or with their new baby or on a trip with their loving husband. They are everywhere and I am just here. And sometimes, I am beginning to think I haven’t seized as much opportunities as I should have.
2004, I went to the US. Could have easily applied for a film scholarship there. Could have easily looked for a writing internship and applied to convert my tourist visa to student. Could have easily inquired about sponsorship and worked there. But no. I went back.
Then, there’s meeting Epy Quizon, who hinted about “pursuing passions early”. Could have headed to MOWELFUND right after that interview. Could have headed to UPFI for an application. Could have headed to LVN or Viva or Star and inquired about a possible internship. But no. I just went back to school.
Worked for Eat Bulaga for almost a year as a commentator/critic. Met the entire cast and crew. Met directors. Writers. Producers. Worked side by side with the veterans of the entertainment business. Could have easily pushed for a better job. Could have easily pushed for more writing gigs. Could have easily kissed ass in hopes of being part of their immediate circle. But no. I just went about my day, working from one paper to another, being invisible.
So yeah. I have a lot of reasons to feel that everything good is happening somewhere else. Because the supposed good things that should be happening to me, I just let them all pass me by. So there. Here I am, wishing for a good thing to come by. Then maybe, if I’m brave enough, I get to be the good thing other people wish happened to them.
I hate the fact that I teared up seeing them dead by the sea.
I hate the fact that I always see your face.
I hate that I know you need flats and stretch pants.
I hate that people are just cold.
And that hate flows freely in me.
And I hate that I am not apathetic.
Because I know that I am comfortable just being hateful.
Now, enter cue music.
the salt of your skin 